Monday, July 09, 2007

The Pen is Mightier Than the Sword

Friday was Grace's 3rd birthday, and an afternoon party was planned. Around one-ish, Sarah asked my sister Jen to help Grace wind down in her room for a little quiet time. The idea of an actual nap ahead of the festivities was remote at best, as she was pretty wound up, especially after getting her new dollhouse as a present.

Jen stayed with her for a while, fell asleep, then decided to go to her own bed for some proper rest. Grace was pretty calm, so it was a no brainer.

I was dispatched to her room about 45 minutes before guests were to arrive to get her up. It had been pretty quiet up there for a while, so perhaps she did fall asleep.

When I opened the door I was greeted by a look of total and utter mischievous guilt. In her right hand was a Red Sharpie. She had been a busy girl.

Both of her legs were covered (and I mean COVERED) with Pollockian lines & splotches. Her stomach had not been spared either. She managed to cover the inside of her bellybutton as well. The arms weren't too bad & she had applied some sharpie eyeliner & rouge, not to mention a small botched hair dye job.

I won't go into any detail about the duvet cover, her bed sheets, some of her new dollhouse furniture & a section of the wide plank pine floors that got a makeover.

My first question to her was "WHERE DID YOU GET THAT SHARPIE????" He reply was defensive, but to the point: "From Auntie Jen," as if that made it all okay. A horrified Jennifer realized that it had fallen out of her pocket when she fell asleep in Grace's room, however briefly. Instantly, she (Grace, but also possibly Jennifer, I am not sure) sensed my anger, and she burst into floods of tears & that kind of early child sobbing that makes you wish you never raised your voice.

A quick call to the Sharpie corporation for advice (the party was only 30 minutes away now) yielded little help, so we just threw her into the bath. By this time she had calmed down enough for me to give her the bath (poor Auntie Jen, now certainly traumatized herself had started the bath as a kind of penance but promptly splashed soap into Grace's eyes. Cue the sobbing anew) & I scrubbed hard enough to give her a couple of bruises.

She wore long pants to the party. And at one point, she took off her trousers (and underwear as well), ran onto the porch with a whole piece of chocolate cake on a fork & exclaimed "CHOCOLATE!!" in a feral sort of voice.

How was your weekend?

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